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“Yes, especially when I was anxious….”
In other words, she was saying she would sleep with me for my sake, in case I felt anxious.
‘Hmm, I suppose it really is a gesture of pure goodwill. Well… she did say she spent most of her life in the mansion because of her frail health. Maybe she really is that naive.’
But then again, I’ve lived only in the Imperial Palace since I was a child. Was this how Emma felt when she first saw me?
Recalling Emma, who had always smiled kindly during their first and second meetings, my guard toward Oksana gradually lowered.
A guard. Come to think of it, it was a ridiculous emotion. Oksana wouldn't even imagine that I could feel jealous of her.
“I was like that too.”
“You mean you slept with Princess Tatyana? I thought so. I had a feeling she was a warm person.”
“You’re the first person to speak of Tanya that way.”
“Is that so? It—it might be because of Therese. Princess Tatyana’s eyes look a bit like Therese’s. What I mean is… some say she has a sharp impression, but I meant that she is actually a kind and gentle person.”
“Thank you for saying that. However, I’ve often been told I look like Tatyana, but you two sisters don’t seem to resemble each other much.”
“I agree! I think so too! Though my mother doesn’t like it when I say that….”
It was surprising. We hadn't been chatting for that long, yet when I looked at the clock, the hour hand had moved forward by an entire hour.
“It’s time to sleep, Oksana. If we stay up any later, you’ll be tired tomorrow morning. Being tired makes the skin sag and wrinkles form faster, which isn't good.”
“Yes… Um, could I ask one thing before we fall asleep?”
“Sure, go ahead.”
As I blew out the lamp, Oksana’s final question drifted through the darkness.
“Your Highness. Do you like Count Valentin?”
“…….”
“…….”
“…….”
“…….”
Good heavens.
Is this what it feels like for one's heart to freeze? I relit the lamp.
“Oksana, by any chance… did Duchess Illyn tell you to find out?”
With a look of sheer bewilderment, Oksana shook her head while pulling the blanket up to her chin.
“What? Oh, no…. I heard that women usually bond by talking about the men they like before going to sleep….”
“Who told you that?”
“Um, um. In the books Mrs. Henry’s Desire and The Blazing Flame.”
“……You learn a lot from books?”
“Yes. Books are… my friends and teachers. Isn't reading wonderful? It allows me to experience and learn so many things without having to venture out into the dangerous world outside the mansion.”
That may be true, but still.
I stared at Oksana’s innocently sparkling face and asked, just in case.
“Don't tell me you have a gentleman you've set your heart on too, Oksana?”
Turning as red as a ripe midsummer apple, Oksana answered while hiding deep inside the blanket.
“Yes, yes. It’s very embarrassing, but I do.”
“Wh—.”
“Please don't be surprised. He's someone Your Highness knows. The most handsome, cheerful, and manly person among those you know. That's right…. It's Prince Ivan…. You might not believe it, but I've harbored feelings for him for ten years. I've rarely gone out in my life, and most of those times were to the Imperial Palace. Every time I went, Prince Ivan greeted me with a smiling face. I'm a fool who is shy, soft-spoken, and can't speak well… but he always joked with me and talked to me regardless. And, do you know? When I was eight, he held my hand and walked through the palace gardens with me. He talked about Princess Larissa then, and since that moment, I've always wanted to meet the Princess. That's why I can't believe that I'm actually lying in bed talking with you right now….”
By the time I snapped back to my senses.
The next day's sun had already risen outside the window.
After only two days of living in Shaharansk, I discovered a few—no, a multitude of—new facts about Oksana.
First, Oksana trips often.
“Ah! Phew… I almost hurt my knee again….”
Second, Oksana loves reading.
“I especially love this part! Would you like to see, Your Highness? Right here, this last paragraph….”
Third, half of her reading consists of pulp novels.
“We mustn't do this, James. You have a fiancée. I, too, am destined to marry my cousin. It cannot be helped if we are to protect the family fortune. Do not look at me with those eyes. Please consider our bond a midsummer night's dream….”
Fourth, her voice becomes loud and clear when talking about things she likes.
“You prefer silver? I'm different. Rather than bright colors, dark brown or black that emphasizes masculinity is the best. If possible, I'd like a description of a short chin and thick fingers. He must have honor, but being arrogant is the worst. He should maintain a minimum of etiquette and tenderness before a woman. Yes, yes? You're asking if I'm talking about Prince Ivan? Oh, no I'm not….”
Fifth, Oksana sincerely respects Duchess Illyn.
“Ah, this is… herbal tea I brewed myself…. My mother has been working late into the night recently…. The night air in this castle is exceptionally cold, so it's better to keep the body warm—ah!”
With a scream, Oksana tumbled forward. I rushed to support her, but it was difficult to help with only one arm, and in the end, the hot tea soaked a part of Oksana's arm.
I rang the bell urgently, but not a single maid appeared. When I asked Oksana why.
“There are no servants?”
“Yes… that's why you must call me when you need help. While Your Highness is staying in this castle, only a minimum number of staff, including the cook, are working….”
Oksana, who had already dampened a towel with cold water, habitually wiped her arm.
“Don't worry, Your Highness. I'm used to doing this alone. I'm so clumsy… so my mother taught me how to treat injuries without the help of a maid.”
It was a strange statement.
It wasn't odd that the security of the castle was being strictly maintained because of me. However, for a daughter of the Illyn family to learn tasks that a maid or a physician would do, simply because she was clumsy?
I waited for an opportunity to run into Duchess Illyn to bring Fedora, but as Oksana said, the Duchess seemed so busy she didn't even have time to blink; she didn't even show her face during mealtimes.
It was contrary to my dignity as a princess to seek out Duchess Illyn myself, but it was a waste of time to just sit and wait in this desolate fortress where there was absolutely nothing to see.
Late at night.
The office of Duchess Illyn, which I happened to visit, had the door slightly ajar. I knocked lightly and entered, but the room was empty. While waiting, I looked around the interior and noticed a pile of scattered papers on the desk.
‘Blueprints?’
And it wasn't just one or two. Judging by the stack on the floor, there were easily over two hundred sheets.
Just then, a voice laced with amusement came from near the fireplace, where the shadows were deep.
“Ah, Theresa… you've come. Come here. It is your father's anniversary of death, so I was having a drink.”
Judging by the slurred voice, she had drunk ten glasses, not one. It seemed I had picked the wrong day. I approached the noblewoman, who was sitting in a chair staring blankly at a portrait.
“Duchess Illyn.”
Meeting my eyes with a thin smile, she let out a long sigh.
“There isn't much time left, my daughter. Your father must be waiting for us…. Yes, for the day we cut off Libertan's head…. Hehe… When that time comes, I should tell Oksana too. That the Prince Ivan she admires so much… is actually her half-brother… Ah, Theresa. My heart aches just imagining the look of disappointment on Oksana's face.”
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